I can't sleep and lately I've been taking sleeping pills to help me sleep, but I'm getting low on my prescription and honestly I really don't wanna be taking them every night becoming dependent on them. I'd rather fall asleep naturally, which rarely happens. I'm usually up, barely sleeping.

   In truth, I really don't care if I sleep tonight, dreams lately have been horrid, full of death, blood, fear and pain. This morning it sounded like someone was breaking in, pounding on the door as if to break it down and I was angry and for some stupid reason I got up and was ready to beat the intruder with a flashlight, but no one was there, it was just a dream. And really, what a stupid idea if it really would have been some intruder. Jeezus, I'd have been dumber than a one legged man carrying a ball-less mule on his back in the desert.

   ....🤔.... Strange analogy, strange mind, but it's what came to mind for some weird reason, but you get the point🤷‍♀️, it would of been stupid.

   But, I really wish I wouldn't dream for a while, a long while...

   The night air feels nice and the stars are bright. The night is quiet except for the sounds of a few generators running in the distance. I was telling my love earlier that it sucks there's no power, but one cool thing is there's no street lights on the block out the stars. There's a sky full of stars and they're beautiful to look up at. But as beautiful as they are, they're nothing compared to how gorgeous and lovely my love is. He's beyond the beauty of the stars...

   I enjoyed being with him earlier today, getting to wrap my arms around him, feeling his embrace, his kiss, his face in my palms, my cheek against his cheek. He feels sooo good!!! It makes me happy every time I see him, every time I'm in his embrace, feeling home because he feels like home to me.

   I miss him when he has to go and the last embrace I so don't wanna let go, I just wanna hold him to me just a little longer, feel him just a little longer. And he has one of those hugs you just don't wanna let go.

   And my god, when I look into those gorgeous earth eyes of his, I melt and when he smiles at me, I have to remind myself to breathe. I miss falling asleep next to him, melting into him, falling asleep to the sound of his heartbeat, his perfect lullaby and the comfort of his skin to mine. But Covid stole that away and now hurricane Ida and it sucks ass, it really sucks ass cuz I miss my baby, I miss my heart, my love.

   Don't know when the power's gonna be back on. Supposedly it's said around the 28th which is 3 weeks from now, ugh😩 sucks a pair of moldy unwashed overgrown hairy donkey balls.

   Water has been on today, so far it's stayed on. Hopefully it'll stay on this time.

   Was able to get my clothes washed. Hand washed of course cuz there's no power to use the washer. Man, was my hands sore after all the squeezing out the water, rinsing and squeezing. My fingers were so pruined I could probably climb a wall, lol, but I needed clean clothes. I'm not about to reuse some dirty draws, hell naw, ick. 

Da booty gonna be clean, da booty gonna be fresh. 

If ya booty ain't clean, then ya probably got dooty in-between. 

And there's your rhyme for today.

   I was messing with my daughter earlier, lol, I tend to get on her nerves with my dirty jokes and silly rhymes, she started coughing and farted and I said, "Fire in the hole!", she started laughing and it was like her farts were laughing as she was laughing and me being the annoying mom like I am and always finding something to joke about, told her a rhythm that was goofy, 


"When that booty loose

   It be leaking that booty juice

     *makes fart noises*

   And when that booty drains

   It be leaving that dooky stain"


   I know, silly, but I couldn't resist blurting out what I was thinking. She just looked at me strange and said "EWWW, MAAA!" through the laughter, lol.

I do have a strange mind, a strange dirty one🤷‍♀️😁.

   ...The stars are really pretty... I did try to lay in the pavement until I felt something crawl on me and I was like, NOPE! I've seen those ugly big honkin' cockroaches before out here and even though it wasn't that, or I'd had been gone, I'm not taking any chance cuz at the 1st sight of one of those ugly disgusting big dooky colored creepy things, you can bet your sweet ass I'll fly back inside faster than superman if he was racing home with the worst case of diarrhea.

   Again, strange thoughts, but hey, 🤷‍♀️ it's what came to mind and I'm gonna say what I'm thinking.

   Think I've written long enough as usual. Probably should get inside as well. Probably not wise sitting outside this late at night/morning. U really never know if some nutjob could be lurking about somewhere and it being as dark as it is, can't really see anything.

   Until next time, I hope you smile...